Big Gai Al!

It must feel weird being known as Star Jones's ex-husband. Obviously, this guy has done or will do nothing more significant than marrying my favorite lawyer-cum-gag-reflex-inducing-talk-show-host. Little known fact: I applied to be Star Jones's  personal assistant.

The Reynolds-Jones union was doomed from the start because as we all know, Al is gay. Big Gay Al, very clever, married Star for her money and dashed right after she lost two shows and became a general nuisance. Al was then seen around gay watering holes and other events, according to "unnamed" and obviously legit sources. 

I forgot why they divorced. It doesn't matter. It's over something stupid like them growing apart. Or it could be the fact that Al's gay, but I doubt that. This video actually disproves his homosexuality. I'm so glad he set up his own YouTube channel yesterday to dispel those raging gay rumors. Attention Us Weekly, National Enquirer and Star! You've been wrong all along - Al's not gay!

Al also didn't know that Star whored out their wedding by asking corporations to sponsor her wedding. If he had known, he would've never gone through with it! That would've been a great excuse to call it off instead of actually coming out of the closet.

Many also wonder why Al fell in love with the Payless Shoe spokesperson. The answer is easy, he fell in love with her mind. Gay guys love women's minds, especially on shopping trips when they need an outfit for that night. 

[Youtube]